Today is a cause for celebration! Not because I am finally divorced. I am not!!! But, because I am so very, very happy to share with you what I, and others, have learned on this difficult journey in the form of a blog. I can honestly say I am a better person today than I was a year ago. I am more focused and free, courageous and savvy, and (dare I say it?) classy!
On this journey, I have met some of my closest friends. I have learned that I AM NOT CRAZY!! The man I married made me crazy!
In the following blog postings I will address topics such as:
-how to find the best lawyer for you
-how to know if your lawyer is aligned with your interests and working
hard enough on your behalf
-what to do if you have not yet pursued divorce but thinking about it
-what kinds of ways will your spouse manipulate you financially before (and after)
you have filed
-what boundaries can I set and what can I do to enforce them?
Please make comments and add your questions (anonymously if you like) or email me. If you have any experiences or comments on a particular topic please comment or better yet, consider posting your thoughts on this blog! I welcome anyone who wants to guest blog. Just email your post to me. Feel free to choose a nom de plume or add your title and business and photo so we can say thank you by supporting your business.
Love to you all,
Christina
Great site Christina! Question-what have you found is an effective way to enforce the boundaries re: already agreed upon topics?
ReplyDeleteBoundaries are an important issue. Whether you have stayed in your home or are in a new home, you need your soon-to-be-ex to understand that he is no longer welcome to enter your home(or car,etc.) First, decide what you would like the boundary to be. Second, ask yourself if he has had boundary issues in the past. Boundaries include behavior throughout your marriage with other people, communication with others or to you physically. If he lacked respect for you in this regard, chances are he will not uphold to a boundary with gray areas. For example, if you are concerned about boundaries at home,know that there is no reason for him to be in the house. The children may not understand this at first. Tell the children it will make you more comfortable and give you the peace you need to be a worry-free,loving mom. In time they will feel a shift in energy from very tense to manageable. They will respect you for creating a safe, positive and nurturing energy in your home. Once the boundary is established, send an email to your spouse and his attorney. If the boundary is crossed email both parties. If done a second time, have your lawyer write a letter to his attorney that you will have to pursue a restraining order. This should make him stop. If not, your attorney can get a restraining order for you anytime day or night. There are judges on call 24 hours a day for precisely this reason.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your first blog post! Good for you for getting started. I look forward to reading lots more.
ReplyDeletexoxo